Park Engineering

 John Park, 32 the Loaning, Motherwell, North Lanarkshire, Strathclyde, Scotland, U.K. ML1 3HE

       mobile 0781 8618547

 "e" mail (click on this to send me an "e" mail)
 this web site


Home / Index


all my comedy stuff.htm




PS Autogrinding.htm

Glasgow Humour.htm


Gyles Brandreth Witty Quotes.htm


Chick Murray.htm

 Cad Projects



 Client List


Company  Profile




 My C.V.


 Jokes & Cartoons


  Favourite links


    Frequently Asked  Questions


 Hardware and    Software


 Customer      Feedback


   Printing            Services


 Cad Tips


 Funny Pictures


 Interesting       Stories


 Bird Flu Humour


 Cheaper Car fuel


 Most   embarrassing moments


130 Year old Joke


Recommended Books


Jokes by type


Park Family Tree


Name and Shame


Tekla Models Sceenshots


Tekla Custom Components.htm



 Weekly Rants


 Terms &            Conditions


Tekla Structures Hints & Tips


Motherwell Masters Swim Club


Computer and Web Design Hints and tips


British Hospitals - True Stories.........

work of the Bonkle Poet William McCormack "Memories O' Hame" and other poems

the poet among other things Bill Baron Irvine


Model Stair Stringers in Tekla


Forbes Gentleman


Robert Burns's Auld Lang Syne


Tekla Structures hints and tips working in drawings


Tekla Advanced Topics.htm


Tekla all my stuff.htm


Tekla Components my Standard connections.htm


ARC Steel Commercials.htm


Calder Fabrications.htm


James Cowie & Co. Ltd.htm


Craig Engineerig.htm

Weldon Engineerig.htm


Anhop Metalwork.htm


Coda Fabrications.htm

Roof Edge.htm


Mansard Roof.htm


Kenny Ball.htm


Marti Pellow.htm




Kathy Kirby.htm


Billy Fury.htm


Petula Clark.htm


The Eagles.htm


Adam Faith.htm


The Searchers.htm


Bob Dylan.htm


Glasgow Humour.htm


Crosswords, a century of fun..htm


Statins Divide.htm


Cassius Clay.htm


Robert Smillie.htm


Charlie Landsborough.htm




Howard Hughes.htm


Tom Clancy.htm


James Patterson.htm




Belhaven Engineering.htm




Neil Sedaka.htm


Jim Davidson.htm


Buddy Holly.htm


Martin Luther King.htm


Charlie Drake.htm


St Vitus' Dance.htm


The Temptations.htm


Elvis Presley.htm


Billy Connolly.htm


Mrs Brown's Boys.htm


Crooner Kings.htm


Saucy Holiday




Jim Reeves.htm


Jack the Ripper.htm


Ken Dodd




Lionel Richie.htm


Ross Noble.htm


Stan Laurel.htm


Dick Turpin.htm


Chang and Eng Siamese Twins.htm




Waterloo Road.htm


Miranda Hart.htm


Kevin Bridges.htm


Tim Vine.htm


Morecambe and Wise.htm


Ku Klux Klan Jokes.htm


Rugby Jokes.htm


Library Jokes.htm


Miller Steel.htm


Miller  Fabrications.htm


Hoop Ladder jobs.htm


Stand Up Comedy, can it be taught.htm


Wilsontown The first ironworks in Lanarkshire.htm


Knicker Jokes.htm

Soul Legend Percy Sledge dies aged 73.htm

Cliff hits ace dies.htm

Stand by Me star Ben E King, dies at 76.htm

Ruth Rendell, Final Page for a great Author.htm

Charley Pride.htm

Oscar Wilde.htm

Frankie Boyle.htm

Zoe Lyons, ElieTaylor, Sara Pasco, Janey Godley, Susan Calman, Sara Millican, Sandi Toksvig.htm

Tom Jones.htm

The Proclaimers.htm

John Bishop.htm

Tommy Cooper.htm

Ricky Gervais.htm

Val Doonican.htm

Rosa Parks. I Have a Dream by Martin Luther King.htm

Joan Rivers.htm

Benny Hill.htm

Susie McCabe.htm


The funniest man who ever lived..htm


Patsy Cline







Richard Gadd




Weekly Rants 3

Iron Horse Pub

Jason Byrne

Alan Carr

Lenny Bruce 3


Bobby Vee hits Take Good Care Of My Baby and Rubber Doll

Joe Brown recalls when he was bigger than Beatles



peter,manual,the,beast,of,birkenshaw,fails,to avoid,the,




Nancy Riach The Lass who won all


What did they do before doing stand up

Hardie vehemently opposed the first world war

bernie keith








Computer and Web Design hints and tips, Front Page

To view a web page on the internet as HTML right click on page, then click source from drop down list.

To repair sending blank "e" mails, click box on bottom left hand side of screen, start search, microsoft outlook, tools, options, mail format, message format, change to plain text

I have just found out that if I add a new web page I have upload both the index and my second page that is cad projects to get them to show up. My web server is streamline.


To remove a 'hard to delete' virus

While system is booting up press F8 on and off. Scroll down to Safe Mode only. Run Malwarebytes. Delete everything that it quarantines.


warning do not delete cookies

To use new web pages uploaded to streamline

In internet explorer, click on top right hand toothed wheel, safety, delete browsing history, unclick * preserve favourite web site data.

Frames frozen on desktop.

Move curser to bottom task bar, right click, task manager, applications. then delete the process(es) that are frozen are stuck


Anti-virus They recon microsoft's own one which is free is the best download from below.


Restore in windows Vista

My internet explorer was playing up recently. When I tried to open a folder for example the explorer box would appear and things would go into a never ending loop. Went to start/Accessories/SYSTEM TOOLS /system restore and restored to a date before the problem started and hey presto the problem was solved. 


When one puts a hyperlink on a web page one must save it in front page before uploading it.

Any future image files I want to upload to my web site have to go into a folder. The hyperlink search can't seem to find them if I don't do this.


My "e" mail stopped working in that it wouldn't let me log on. I had to do the following.  windows mail / internet accounts / mail.btinternet / properties / servers / untick login using secure password.

For the record my fax system is Classic Phone Tools by Avanquest.


When adjusting the size of a image/picture using the diagonal double arrow after moving the the double arrow hold it in the position one wants it to move. This can take a little time to happen.


My "e" mail recently stopped being able to send "e" mails. This was sorted by going to windows mail / tools / accounts / servers and then re-entering password. This may have had something to do with me installing Vista service release 1 on to my system. Tekla service release 16.1 SR1 needs vista SR 2 installed Vista SR2 needs SR 1 installed and so we go on.

The smallest size of image file is a jpeg. If you have a file in any other format open paint this is in the accessories folder in the program folder. You can then "save as" to .jpeg The max size facebook will accept for example is 4 MB

When one gets fancy text that you want to use on a web page. Past it into notebook first sort it out then copy again. Notebook is also in the accessories file.

To put a image file onto a web page insert / photo from the root directory into where curser is. Then you can adjust photo size with handles. Persevere with corner diagonal handle. The last time I tried this I had to put the jpeg file in a separate folder before it would work.

My web site folder is currently  (September 2010) at 58 MB. The streamline package I have has a limit of 500 MB

Want to merge .pdf files go to This allow you to do up to ten files free. However the first one comes out portrait in stead of landscape so I had to put in a header. Put the nine drawings plus the header in the one folder. Name the header A as they automatically go in alphabetical order.

Latest virus protection is Microsoft Security Essentials. It's a small green house with a green tick in it on the the bottom right hand side of the screen. The other virus protection I use is Malwarebytes. Both these have been updated today on the 24 04 2012.